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Do zombies crave human flesh? What is the black market product that they keep in the fridge? What do they do at Live Dead that makes them prohibit all but a few living humans? Are they content just to continue being until they decay and disappear?…
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Grindouse is a schlock, B-movie double-feature by this generations “renegade” directors (Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino for those not in the know). The films feature fake trailers by famous horror-movie directors, purposefully scratchy film quality, 70’s-era special effects, and typical Taranntino dialogue. Are they “good” movies? Not really, but it is fucking awesome…
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I’ve learned a lot from Kenny Rogers. Thanks to him, I known when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em, know when to walk away, and I even know when to run. I learned that sometimes you have to fight to be a man. And I even learned that love will turn you around. Turn. You. Around…
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I saw the preview for this movie once, and thought, “Oh, yeah!” I
looked at the cast, the style presented in the preview, and thought it was going to be fantastic. I wasn’t wrong, but my perceptions were a little bit off…
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Lately, I haven’t watched television. I haven’t gotten to browse around movie sites on the internet. I haven’t even really gotten to shoot the bull with friends, all of whom know more about upcoming movies than I do. When I heard that Broken Lizard had a new movie coming out, and then I saw the preview, I was ALL OVER IT. …
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Reviews. I used to churn ‘em out like a short-order cook with cheeseburgers, but real life got in the way some time ago and I wound up finding less time in which to write them. Along the way, my inspiration sort of fizzled as well. But if there’s anything that can inspire me to crank out some words and stick them in cyberspace, it’s a Kevin Smith movie…
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Yes, I went to see The Breakup. [The Aniston/Pitt/Jolie joke would go here, if it hadn't already been done to death everywhere else.]
The previews have propped it up as a comedy, but I’ve already heard the first wave of backlash and it’s warned me to expect a not-comedy about two people sadly breaking up. Man, I would’ve been pissed too if I brought a date to an ironically-titled romantic comedy that turned out to be a literally-titled buzzkiller. And it was a buzzkill…
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was a little disappointed when I found out that the Mike Mills that directed Thumbsucker was not the same one that plays the bass and sometimes sings for R.E.M. Michael Stipe’s all about Independent film, so why not Mills? I guess he’s too busy being the most talented member of that band to make indie flicks about teen angst…
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You know how when you were a kid, and you used to sing “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” with your schoolmates, you added your own little remarks at the end of each verse…
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So what happens when you make a sequel to a sequel? I mean, most sequels beyond the first one are technically following the first sequel, which makes them sort of sequels to sequels, but I’m talking specifically when a sequel only really serves as a sequel to one particular sequel…
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If I’m going to start off the 2005 Christmas season right, I guess I ought to do so with a review of the latest bundle of holiday joy in movie theaters at this moment. What better way than with a tale of greed, deception, and murder, all of which just so happens to fall on Christmas Eve…
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When you’re dealing with a film genre that involves dead people coming to life and eating the flesh of the living, it’s ironic that it’s so hard to take most of the films in it seriously. I mean, that sounds like pretty heavy duty serious shit…
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I don’t claim to be the world’s most respected authority on what constitutes a Zombie, but I think I’m pretty good at knowing when I see one. I will say that if the only thing that seperates a Zombie from its living counterpart is the color of its skin, then I would hesitate to call that thing a Zombie…
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Before I went on vacation about two weeks ago, my wife and I decided that we needed a night AWAY from the house. She’s the daughter of a former NFL
quarterback and I’m just a movie freak, so we decided to check out the recent remake of The Longest Yard…
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Not being outdoorsy people, my brother and I choose to spend Labor Day in the comfort of a movie theater. Most of the choices were pretty lame (penguins, romantic comedies, or pointless action flicks) so we had no trouble in deciding on The Brothers Grimm for our viewing pleasure…
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As I walked out of the multiplex after seeing The 40 Year-Old Virgin, I made a comment to my party about some of the props used in the film. I mentioned that in one scene in Andy Stitzer’s kitchen, there is a bootleg version of the Japanese Beast Wars Neo toy Heinrad…
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So a comedian walks in to a movie producer’s office for a pitch meeting. He says “I’ve got a really great idea for a documentary, and I’d like for you to produce it.” The producer shakes his head and turns the comedian away, saying “Sorry, I don’t produce documentaries. They’re too risky”…
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Last week, I found myself up in Akron, Ohio. . . again. This time, though, there was no amusing tornado weather to keep me occupied. I wound up at the Fairlawn Regal again, faced another set of annoying movie choices, and settled for the latest installment of Deuce Bigalow…
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Charlie and Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory was good. I’m a big fan of the Gene Wilder original, but they really did a good job with this one. Johnny Depp plays a different kind of Wonka, so it’s cool. He plays it pedo-creepy like Michael Jackson…
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