EPISODE 1: INTRODUCING THE SURREAL PLAYERS

"Corey jokes that he and Vince have probably dated a lot of the same women. Ah, the joy of being a rock star. You apparently have a well of beautiful women you can collect and trade with your friends!"

EPISODE 2: THE SURREAL CAMPING TRIP

"Corey! Vince! Gabrielle! Webster! Brande! Hammerman! That Survivor Chick! In a house! Fighting over groceries! Eating sushi off a nekkid lady! Sharing secrets! You get the picture, right?"

EPISODE 3: A SURREAL TALENT SHOW

"Personally, I didn't think Manny was even in the running. I think people see him as a sideshow freak, but I still want to punch the guy in the face."

EPISODE 4: SURREAL LIFE GOES TO VEGAS

"Corey is an emotional machine. He's such a sensitive artistic type. Nobody seems to understand him except for himself and Suzie. He's like an emo kid, to the extreme. He's Extremo."

EPISODE 5: BRANDE GETS A SURREAL DATE

"Now, if there's anything in this world that's more amusing than a volatile confrontation between Corey Feldman and MC Hammer over the defication habits of Corey, then I'd like to know what that is."

EPISODE 6: THE SURREAL CHARITY SOFTBALL GAME

"Vince says that Corey's afraid of the ball. I think Corey's afraid of reality. And I still find it odd that little Reggie from The Bad News Bears takes one of the most lame strikeouts in softball history just watching."

EPISODE 7: THE SURREAL WEDDING OF THE CENTURY

"Her mother recounts a story of how after watching STAND BY ME she wrote a love note to Corey and how this was all destiny. Right, like Susie was the ONLY girl in the world who wrote a love note to Corey Feldman, or Corey Haim, or both."

All Material Copyright 2002 Movie Criticism for the Retarded